Dear Friends of the Pub Quiz,
This week’s newsletter comes courtesy of my wife, the writer Kate Duren.
The Big Update
Where to begin? Many of you know that I went into the hospital for a total hip replacement last Monday. I was quite anxious about this procedure, as I’ve had way too many surgeries in the last few years, and they don’t typically go well. But because every step I walked, whether around the house or around the UC Davis Arboretum, was accompanied by pain up and down my left leg, I knew I had to address the problem of my left hip. I did my research, chose to be brave, trusted my surgeon and health care system and went for it! I was so ready to put constant and increasing discomfort behind me.
Almost nothing went as planned. When I woke up from surgery, I could not feel my foot. At first I thought it normal to be numb right after surgery. Then I realized I couldn’t move my foot or ankle, and that my leg was also numb. Also, unable to think straight, I couldn’t sit up or focus my eyes. My surgeon came in and told us that she had no idea why I couldn’t feel my leg or move my foot. When she said she had never seen this before, I began to panic.
(The long version of this story includes shockingly poor treatment from UC Davis Health, and from my surgeon. I am in the middle of a battle to get the treatment I need from a team that refuses to acknowledge the severity of my injury.)
Later that Monday, we learned that my sciatic nerve had been stretched or crushed during surgery. Physical therapists quickly put my foot in a boot to protect it and my ankle, and they wanted to get me up walking to test my hip. Two nurses had to pick me up out of bed as I thought to myself I have never been so tired in my life. I felt like the Earth had somehow tripled its gravity. I took a few steps, dragging my paralyzed foot along, said, “I feel dizzy,” and they got me right back to bed.
What we have since learned is that my damaged nerve could slowly heal from such an injury, but the condition can also be permanent. There is no way to know which camp I’m in. Hoping that my attitude matters, I am choosing to be positive and hoping, hoping, hoping to regain the use of my foot. Still, I’ve shed many tears this week. When it comes to imagined recoveries, this is the scariest mountain I’ve hoped to climb. I should say that I am trying to climb it!
I wish someone told me that the reason I felt so sick and anxious and confused and weak was that I had lost so much blood during the surgery. Instead, everyone who entered my room commented that I looked extremely pale. I needed a blood transfusion. Watching the blood drip down the tiny tube and into the needle in my hand, going the reverse direction that it always had was a surreal feeling. Having donated a lot of blood in my life, I never thought I’d be on the receiving end. I’m grateful for whomever provided me that A negative.
With the addition of new blood, I had enough strength to begin learning to walk with my new hip and my foot and leg in an AFO (ankle foot orthosis) brace to stabilize it. My PT named Joel taught me to get in and out of bed, and to climb stairs using the railing and a crutch. We practiced getting in and out of a fake car, which he adjusted to match the height of my Prius.
One night in the hospital, I was wakened several times by strong jolts that felt like electricity to my left leg. Each time, my leg JUMPED as if I were surrounded by people activating all of my reflexes at once. Could this be my nerve trying to wake up, I wondered? I may have to wait many months to find out.
While in the hospital, I found a few people around the world who have experienced this rare injury. We have become fast friends, and they’ve helped me tremendously.
Of course I worry about the Davis New Parent Support Group I lead each week. Lovely mamas have raised their hands to offer to cover facilitating the group until I can return. One new mom offered to organize a meal train. How thrilled I was to see her today when she dropped off a delicious dinner. I cannot wait to return to my group!
I’m now home from the hospital and happy to be falling asleep with Andy’s arms around me and waking up to Margot sniffing my hair. Instead of antiseptic cleaners, I smell the jasmine growing along our fence. Truman has been doing the grocery shopping and cleaning the house. Jukie looks at my walker in puzzlement, and I tell him, “Mommy needs help with walking right now.” Geneva knew I needed my girl and a dose of Gene Wilder, so she came over and we all watched Blazing Saddles.
I’ve started home health OT and PT. In a week or so, I will start neuro PT. Meanwhile, Andy has learned how to hold my foot and gently lift it as I try to move it. While my left foot has little sensation and won’t yet respond to my directed thoughts, it still feels good to be in Andy’s warm hands. Surely his loving touch will help me heal.
As I begin a long and uncertain road of recovery and rehabilitation, I have been reflecting not only on the challenges I face, but also on the many blessings I have already experienced.
Nurses are heroes. I felt like I made a 12-hour friendship with each nurse I had. Two stood out. I will always remember the way Claudia saw my fear and vulnerability and took the time to reassure me and go out of her way to help me in ways I didn’t even know I needed.
Patricia told me she immigrated to the US from Poland, first moving to Chicago. We talked about how hard it is to live far from our moms. She fluffed my pillows, said I looked cold, and tucked me in with warm blankets. When I woke up the next morning, she greeted me with, “guess what I learned about last night?… Smith-Lemli-Opitz syndrome!” She had studied the SLO Foundation website. The love, kindness, and empathy that nurses bring to their jobs every day is so appreciated by their patients. It brings me to tears.
I am surrounded by an army of loving friends. Word got out that my surgery came with serious complications, and the cavalry arrived. My fierce advocates sat with me in the hospital by day and then researched my injury after visiting hours. When my PT couldn’t fit my new brace in my shoe, one friend immediately said, “take mine!” She knew that her shoes were one size bigger. (She went home wearing my too-small left shoe. ) Knowing my extreme claustrophobia, one friend stayed with me when I had to get a late night MRI. She cradled my head in her hands during the long, noisy procedure, and sang to me in my ear the entire time. Everyone brought something special, whether it was a shoulder for me to sob onto or a deck of tarot that instructed me to receive the love around me and to give that love to myself. I do not know how I would have survived those days without my posse of loving friends.
I still can’t even keep up with the messages I am receiving. That’s okay — keep them coming! You all are helping me so much.
And so the update is that I walked into the hospital an able-bodied woman in the prime of life, and I left with a new hip and a paralyzed foot. While I am terrified that I’ll never be able to move my foot again, I am also going to do everything humanly possible to help that nerve heal. Along the way, I imagine that I will learn huge lessons in patience and hope.
Thank you all for your love and kindness. I feel your positive juju, and it means the world to me.
Kate Duren
The weather will be comfortable on this Wednesday night. If you are in Davis this evening, please join us at Sudwerk. Recruit a team and join us at the beautiful outdoor patio where we have room for everyone. Even though it is more work for me, we always have more fun with the bigger crowds and more voices. As Saint Augustine allegedly said, “Good times and crazy friends make the best memories.”
In addition to topics raised above, tonight’s pub quiz will feature questions on cofounders, farms, history lessons, driving distances, Winnipeg, villains named Ralph, Best Actress nominees, tigers, National Poetry Month heroes, entire overcrowded towns where they leave the lights on for you, mulligans, impressive women pioneers, theatrical devices, holidays, people who roam, TV actors, vegetables, leading edges, statisticians, baths, polluters, unfortunate public remarks, U.S. states, current events, books and authors, and Shakespeare.
Thanks to my new patron Adam who has been enjoying fresh Pub Quiz content. Thanks also to Brooke, Jeannie, Becky, Franklin, and More Cow Bell. Every week I check the Patreon to see if there is someone new to thank. I also thank The Original Vincibles, Summer Brains, The Outside Agitators, John Poirier’s team Quizimodo, Gena Harper, the dependable Mavens, and others who support the Pub Quiz on Patreon. I would love to add your name or that of your team to the list of supporters. I appreciate your backing this pub quiz project of mine!
Best,
Dr. Andy
P.S. Here are three questions from last week’s quiz:
- Newspaper Headlines. Kirsten Dunst revealed today that she is open to starring in a remake of her most famous 2000 cheerleading movie. Name the film.
- Economic Entomology. Born in 1857, which of the following is the full name of the Leland who helped establish economic entomology as a profession in the United States: Leland Ossian Howard, Leland Stanford, or Leland Yee? Just for fun, for this question, I will provide the answer: Leland Ossian Howard (the other two were Californians who founded Stanford University and who served as a California State Senator until he was sentenced to prison for gun trafficking and other charges)
- Pop Culture – Music. Living from 1926 to 1967, what saxophonist received numerous posthumous awards, including a special Pulitzer Prize? Hint: he was also canonized by the African Orthodox Church.
P.P.S. Thanks for reading to the end of the newsletter. Have you considered becoming a patron?